Search the archive:
Simviation Main Site
|
Site Search
|
Upload Images
Simviation Forum
›
General
›
Humour
› Men can fix anything...
(Moderators: Mitch., Fly2e, ozzy72, beaky, Clipper, JBaymore, Bob70, BigTruck)
‹
Previous Topic
|
Next Topic
›
Pages:
1
2
Men can fix anything... (Read 1238 times)
Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 7:03pm
patchz
Offline
Colonel
What, me worry?
IN THE FUNNY PAPERS
Gender:
Posts: 10589
Don't have a spoon? I can fix that.
Seatbelt broken? I can fix that.
New TV too big for the old cabinet? I can fix that.
Electrical problem? I can fix that.
Car stereo stolen? I can fix that.
Bookshelf cracking under the weight? I can fix that.
No ice chest? I can fix that.
Can't read the ATM screen? I can fix that.
Car imported from the wrong country? I can fix that.
Satellite go out in the rain? I can fix that.
Electric stove broken and can't heat coffee? I can fix that.
Wiper motor burned out? I can fix that.
Display rack falling over? I can fix that.
WTF?
Exhaust pipe dragging? I can fix that.
Gotta feed the baby AND do the laundry? I can fix that.
Cables falling behind desk? I can fix that.
If God intended aircraft engines to have horizontally opposed engines, Pratt and Whitney would have made them that way.
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #1 -
Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 7:29pm
CHUCK79
Offline
Global Moderator
"Good grief"
KOMK
Gender:
Posts: 4998
Holy crap.....MacGyver would be astonished with some of those
Good stuff
"Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth and danced the skies on laughter silvered wings. Sunward I've climbed and joined the tumbling mirth of sun split clouds.....and done a hundred things you have never dreamed of.....wheeled and soared and swung high in the sunlit silence. Hovering there, I've chased the shouting wind along and flung my eager craft through footless halls of air.
Up, up the long, delerious, burning blue I've topped the wind swept heights with easy grace where never Lark, nor even Eagle flew. While with silent lifting of mind I've trod the high untrespassed sanctity of space, put out my hand and touched the face of god"
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #2 -
Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 8:30pm
DaveSims
Offline
Colonel
Clear Lake, Iowa
Gender:
Posts: 2453
That last one I am going to have to do at work tomorrow. I am always losing the cables.
Dave
www.flymcw.com
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #3 -
Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 8:58pm
patchz
Offline
Colonel
What, me worry?
IN THE FUNNY PAPERS
Gender:
Posts: 10589
DaveSims wrote
on Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 8:30pm:
That last one I am going to have to do at work tomorrow. I am always losing the cables.
First, I have to find my clips.
If God intended aircraft engines to have horizontally opposed engines, Pratt and Whitney would have made them that way.
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #4 -
Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 9:05pm
Romulus111VADT
Offline
Colonel
Gender:
Posts: 5521
"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."
Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”
Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #5 -
Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 9:16pm
B-Valvs
Offline
Colonel
Jaggie Police
5B2
Gender:
Posts: 5949
DaveSims wrote
on Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 8:30pm:
That last one I am going to have to do at work tomorrow. I am always losing the cables.
That one really is a great idea. If we make them look a little prettier we could sell them on TV. A set of 5 for only 4.99. But wait, call now and we'll double the offer!
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #6 -
Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 11:05pm
patchz
Offline
Colonel
What, me worry?
IN THE FUNNY PAPERS
Gender:
Posts: 10589
I think Brandon has a future in advertising.
If God intended aircraft engines to have horizontally opposed engines, Pratt and Whitney would have made them that way.
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #7 -
Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 12:32am
B-Valvs
Offline
Colonel
Jaggie Police
5B2
Gender:
Posts: 5949
patchz wrote
on Feb 13
th
, 2011 at 11:05pm:
I think Brandon has a future in advertising.
We would sell literally a dozen! Maybe even more!
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #8 -
Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 12:49am
patchz
Offline
Colonel
What, me worry?
IN THE FUNNY PAPERS
Gender:
Posts: 10589
Or maybe comedy.
If God intended aircraft engines to have horizontally opposed engines, Pratt and Whitney would have made them that way.
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #9 -
Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 1:06am
CHUCK79
Offline
Global Moderator
"Good grief"
KOMK
Gender:
Posts: 4998
There is bound to be.......fives...maybe tens of dollars to be made here
Sign me up
"Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth and danced the skies on laughter silvered wings. Sunward I've climbed and joined the tumbling mirth of sun split clouds.....and done a hundred things you have never dreamed of.....wheeled and soared and swung high in the sunlit silence. Hovering there, I've chased the shouting wind along and flung my eager craft through footless halls of air.
Up, up the long, delerious, burning blue I've topped the wind swept heights with easy grace where never Lark, nor even Eagle flew. While with silent lifting of mind I've trod the high untrespassed sanctity of space, put out my hand and touched the face of god"
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #10 -
Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 9:14am
TacitBlue
Offline
Colonel
That's right, I have my
own logo.
Saint Joseph, Missouri, USA
Gender:
Posts: 5391
The one about the steering wheel is actually pretty common. A lot of mail men on rural routes where they have to use their own car do that so that they can sit on the right side and easily reach the mail boxes. The whole rig is sold as a kit.
My Mom is a mail man... mail woman...
letter carrier
, but she only has an extra break pedal on the right side, no steering wheel.
A&P Mechanic, Rankin Aircraft 78Y
Aircraft are naturally beautiful because form follows function. -TB
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #11 -
Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 11:55am
patchz
Offline
Colonel
What, me worry?
IN THE FUNNY PAPERS
Gender:
Posts: 10589
TacitBlue wrote
on Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 9:14am:
The one about the steering wheel is actually pretty common. A lot of mail men on rural routes where they have to use their own car do that so that they can sit on the right side and easily reach the mail boxes. The whole rig is sold as a kit.
My Mom is a mail man... mail woman...
letter carrier
, but she only has an extra break pedal on the right side, no steering wheel.
I've always been amazed at the letter carriers in rural areas that have to drive that way. With power windows, I think I would just use one of those grabber sticks.
http://www.amazon.com/32-Reacher-Grabber-Pick-Stick/dp/B0016P1VT2
If God intended aircraft engines to have horizontally opposed engines, Pratt and Whitney would have made them that way.
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #12 -
Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 1:35pm
Ang2dogs
Offline
Colonel
No matter where you go,
there you are.
black mountain hills of Dakota
Gender:
Posts: 848
I use to use my combat boots to hold up my iron to make soup and coffee when they took away our microwaves, (cause some S#!tbirds didn't keep theres clean). And if your buddy let you borrow there iron you could make grill cheese sandwiches, just make sure you sprayy on the Pam, not the starch
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #13 -
Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 4:44pm
H
Offline
Colonel
2003: the year NH couldn't
save face...
NH, USA
Gender:
Posts: 6837
TacitBlue wrote
on Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 9:14am:
My Mom is a mail man... mail woman...
letter carrier
, but she only has an extra
break
pedal on the right side, no steering wheel.
Most of us would rather a brake pedal... things fall apart easily enough on their own -- or is that the pedal she pushes when she wants to stop for coffee?
Back to top
IP Logged
Reply #14 -
Feb 15
th
, 2011 at 10:43pm
TacitBlue
Offline
Colonel
That's right, I have my
own logo.
Saint Joseph, Missouri, USA
Gender:
Posts: 5391
H wrote
on Feb 14
th
, 2011 at 4:44pm:
Most of us would rather a brake pedal... things fall apart easily enough on their own -- or is that the pedal she pushes when she wants to stop for coffee?
I assume that she uses it when she stops for coffee, or when she stops for lunch, or even when she stops to correct my spelling.
A&P Mechanic, Rankin Aircraft 78Y
Aircraft are naturally beautiful because form follows function. -TB
Back to top
IP Logged
Pages:
1
2
‹
Previous Topic
|
Next Topic
›
« Home
‹ Board
Top of this page
Forum Jump »
Home
» 10 most recent Posts
» 10 most recent Topics
Current Flight Simulator Series
- Flight Simulator X
- FS 2004 - A Century of Flight
- Adding Aircraft Traffic (AI) & Gates
- Flight School
- Flightgear
- MS Flight
Graphic Gallery
- Simviation Screenshots Showcase
- Screenshot Contest
- Edited Screenshots
- Photos & Cameras
- Payware Screenshot Showcase
- Studio V Screenshot Workshop
- Video
- The Cage
Design Forums
- Aircraft & 3D Design
- Scenery & Panel Design
- Aircraft Repainting
- Designer Feedback
General
- General Discussion
- Humour ««
- Music, Arts & Entertainment
- Sport
Computer Hardware & Software Forum
- Hardware
- Tweaking & Overclocking
- Computer Games & Software
- HomeBuild Cockpits
Addons Most Wanted
- Aircraft Wanted
- Other Add-ons Wanted
Real World
- Real Aviation
- Specific Aircraft Types
- Autos
- History
On-line Interactive Flying
- Virtual Airlines Events & Messages
- Multiplayer
Simviation Site
- Simviation News & Info
- Suggestions for these forums
- Site Questions & Feedback
- Site Problems & Broken Links
Combat Flight Simulators
- Combat Flight Simulator 3
- Combat Flight Simulator 2
- Combat Flight Simulator
- CFS Development
- IL-2 Sturmovik
Other Websites
- Your Site
- Other Sites
Payware
- Payware
Old Flight Simulator Series
- FS 2002
- FS 2000
- Flight Simulator 98
Simviation Forum
» Powered by
YaBB 2.5 AE
!
YaBB Forum Software
© 2000-2010. All Rights Reserved.
Pages: 1 
