Simviation Forum - A few jokes

Oct 15^th, 2010 at 11:58pm

SeanTK Ex Member

At a recent job interview:

What would you consider to be your main
weaknesses and strengths?

Well my main weakness would be my issues with
reality, telling what's real from what's not.

And your strengths?

I'm Batman.
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The iPad: Because the iPhone was too small for
other people to notice you.

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Schizophrenia - together I can beat it.

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Finally managed a slam-dunk today. Tea everywhere.

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I bet that Chilean miner, who promised to marry his girlfriend if he was rescued, put up a good fight before they finally got him into the rescue pod!

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--

I have to congratulate the trapped miners. That is
by far the best plan I've seen to get away from
your wife to hang out with your mates in a long
time.

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My bank lets me send a text message and it'll text
back with my balance.

It's a cool feature but I didn't think the 'LOL'
was necessary.
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I'm using guinea pigs as guinea pigs to see if I
like guinea pigs.

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Pre-rescue Chilean miner jokes:

The 33 trapped miners in Chile are now being
supplied with rice and beans. And relatives have
lit candles around the entrance.

They haven't thought this through.

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If David Blaine is in the capsule when it comes
up, I'm gonna s*** myself.

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Let's put the doll from 'Saw' down to the trapped
miners first before the rescue,see how their sense
of humour is holding up.

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I really hope the first miner out raises his fists
in triumph, stops, pats his pockets, says
"Keys!" and gets back in the pod.

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Reply #1 - Oct 16^th, 2010 at 5:21am

Souichiro Offline
Colonel

Posts: 1092

Epic post! especially the first one!

&&

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Reply #2 - Oct 16^th, 2010 at 3:28pm

H Offline
Colonel
2003: the year NH couldn't
save face...
NH, USA

Gender:
Posts: 6837

One of these reminds me of an actual telecast news report, many moons ago, during prepations for a space flight:
"The astronauts had a breakfast of eggs, toast and bacon this morning... which should be coming up shortly."

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Reply #3 - Oct 16^th, 2010 at 5:51pm

patchz Offline
Colonel
What, me worry?
IN THE FUNNY PAPERS

Gender:
Posts: 10589

H wrote on Oct 16^th, 2010 at 3:28pm:

One of these reminds me of an actual telecast news report, many moons ago, during prepations for a space flight:
"The astronauts had a breakfast of eggs, toast and bacon this morning... which should be coming up shortly."

You forgot about the Tang. Roll Eyes

If God intended aircraft engines to have horizontally opposed engines, Pratt and Whitney would have made them that way.

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Reply #4 - Oct 16^th, 2010 at 6:33pm

Fozzer Offline
Colonel
An elderly FS 2004 addict!
Hereford. England. EGBS.

Posts: 24861

"The 33 trapped miners in Chile are now being
supplied with rice and beans. And relatives have
lit candles around the entrance."

"....They haven't thought this through."

.... Grin

...

...!

Paul...stand clear!.... Grin

...!

Dell Dimension 5000 BTX Tower. Win7 Home Edition, 32 Bit. Intel Pentium 4, dual 2.8 GHz. 2.5GB RAM, nVidia GF 9500GT 1GB. SATA 500GB + 80GB. Philips 17" LCD Monitor. Micronet ADSL Modem only. Saitek Cyborg Evo Force. FS 2004 + FSX. Briggs and Stratton Petrol Lawn Mower...Motor Bikes. Gas Cooker... and lots of musical instruments!.... ...!
Yamaha MO6,MM6,DX7,DX11,DX21,DX100,MK100,EMT10,PSR400,PSS780,Roland GW-8L v2,TR505,Casio MT-205,Korg CX3v2 dual manual,+ Leslie 760,M-Audio Prokeys88,KeyRig,Cubase,Keyfax4,Guitars,Orchestral,Baroque,Renaissance,Medieval Instruments.

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Reply #5 - Oct 18^th, 2010 at 11:01pm

MiG Killer Ex Member

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