Four huge dog dishes by the porch steps and a note on the door:

"Bubba",

Bertha, Duke, Slim, & I went for more ammo and beer.  Be back in an hour. 
Don't mess with the pit  bulls; they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. 
I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. 
Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house. 
Better wait outside.  Be right back.

"Cooter"