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Just hold me.... (Read 400 times)
Dec 7th, 2009 at 9:10am

JakesF14   Offline
Colonel
Blistering Barnacles!
South Africa

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I never quite figured out why the s#xual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!!

What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits.

She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited.

She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"
I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having s#x tonight either....but at least that girl knows I'm smarter than her.


 

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Reply #1 - Dec 7th, 2009 at 11:50am

Rich H   Offline
Colonel
Sweden Jamboree 2011!
Solihull, U.K.

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Nice one Grin Grin Grin
 

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"Politics" is made up of two words, "Poli", which is Greek for "many", and "tics", which are blood sucking insects. - Gore Vidal
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Reply #2 - Dec 7th, 2009 at 5:51pm

lunitic_8   Offline
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FSX+REX= OMG!!!! :o
La Porte, Texas (T41)

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Grin Grin Grin Grin I shall note of this for the future  Wink Cheesy
 

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"Stand up for what you believe in even if your not popular" - fortune cookie   I'm running a hp pavilion a1610n with a Nvidia GeForce 8800 GT OC
         
By the way... the name is Chad Tongue
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Reply #3 - Dec 14th, 2009 at 12:34am

Mazza   Offline
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:D
Melbourne, Australia.

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Grin Grin Grin
 

Sunset Chasing...RULES

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