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I just love this one (Read 233 times)
Nov 18th, 2005 at 4:13pm

Saitek   Offline
Colonel
UK

Gender: male
Posts: 7555
*****
 
I think it has been posted before though... but many folk probably haven't seen it.

Sign in the Bank Lobby reads: "Please note that this Bank
is installing new Drive-through teller machines enabling
customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles.
Customers using his new facility are requested to use the
procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.
After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE procedures
have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for
your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to the cash machine.
2. Put down your car window.
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
6. Put window up.
7. Drive off.

FEMALE PROCEDURE:
1. Drive up to cash machine.
2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car
window with the machine.
3. Set parking brake, put the window down.
4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat
to locate card.
5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and
hang up.
6. Attempt to insert card into machine.
7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to
its excessive distance from the car.
8. Insert card.
9. Re-insert card the right way.
10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN
written on the inside back page.
11. Enter PIN.
12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
13. Enter amount of cash required.
14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
15. Retrieve cash and receipt.
16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash
inside.
17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt
in back of checkbook.
18. Re-check makeup.
19. Drive forward 2 feet.
20. Reverse back to cash machine.
21. Retrieve card.
22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card
into the slot provided.
23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind
you.
24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
25. Redial person on cell phone.
26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
27. Release Parking Brake.
 

Windows 7 Pro 64bit
Intel Core 2 Duo E2180 2GHz
GA-P35-DS3L Intel P35
Kingston HyperX 4GB (2x2) DDR2 6400C4 800Mhz
GeForce 8800 GT 512MB
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200GB Sata
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Flying FSX with Saitek's pro flight range:
Radio
Switch panel
Auto-pilot
Yoke and throttle quad
Pedals
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Reply #1 - Nov 18th, 2005 at 6:28pm

Sytse   Offline
Colonel
Virtual Red Arrows
The Netherlands

Gender: male
Posts: 3590
*****
 
release parking brake...
LAMO  Grin
Thanks for bringing this one up again! Haven't heard it in a long time.
 
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Reply #2 - Nov 20th, 2005 at 12:33pm

BFMF   Offline
Colonel
Pacific Northwest

Gender: male
Posts: 19820
*****
 
lol
 
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Reply #3 - Nov 20th, 2005 at 6:09pm

Corsair Freak   Offline
Colonel
Tiskilwa, Illinois, U.S.A.

Gender: male
Posts: 1537
*****
 
lmao
 
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Reply #4 - Nov 21st, 2005 at 4:26am

ozzy72   Offline
Global Moderator
Pretty scary huh?
Madsville

Gender: male
Posts: 37122
*****
 
Why do drive-thru (that is the correct American spelling?) ATMs have braille facilities?
 

...
There are two types of aeroplane, Spitfires and everything else that wishes it was a Spitfire!
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Reply #5 - Nov 21st, 2005 at 5:29am

TacitBlue   Offline
Colonel
That's right, I have my
own logo.
Saint Joseph, Missouri, USA

Gender: male
Posts: 5391
*****
 
Not exactly correct, but that is how we shorten the word "through" for use on advertising signs and such. Wink They have braille on the buttons because it is cheaper for the ATM manufacturers to just make one type of keypad that fits all types of ATMs. Did I just suck all of the humor out of your post, Ozzy? Grin
 

...
A&P Mechanic, Rankin Aircraft 78Y

Aircraft are naturally beautiful because form follows function. -TB
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