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› A letter home
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A letter home (Read 393 times)
Oct 24
th
, 2005 at 9:23pm
cableguy
Offline
Colonel
Denver, CO
Gender:
Posts: 365
Dont know if this has been posted or not
This Text is from an actual letter from a kid from Eromanga to Mum and Dad after joining the army.
(For those of you not in the know, Eromanga is a small town west of Quilpie approx 10 hours west of Brisbane in the far south west of Queensland, Australia)
Dear Mum & Dad,
I am well. Hope youse are too.
Tell me big brothers Doug and Phil that the Army is better than workin' on the farm - tell them to get in bloody quick smart before the jobs are all gone!
I wuz a bit slow in settling down at first, because ya don't hafta get outta bed until 6am. But I like sleeping in now, cuz all you gotta do before brekky is make ya bed and shine ya boots and clean ya uniform. No bloody cows to milk, no calves to feed, no feed to stack nothin'!! Blokes haz gotta shave though, but its not so bad, coz there's lotsa hot water and even a light to see what ya doing!
At brekky ya get cereal, fruit and eggs but there's no kangaroo steaks or possum stew like wot Mum makes. You don't get fed again until noon, and by that time all the city boys are buggered because we've been on a 'route march' - geez its only just like walking to the windmill in the back paddock!!
This one will kill me brothers Doug and Phil with laughter.
I keep getting medals for shootin' - dunno why. The bullseye is as big as a bloody possum's bum and it don't move and its not firing back at ya like the Johnsons did when our big scrubber bull got into their prize cows before the Ekka last year! All ya gotta do is make yourself comfortable and hit the target - its a piece of piss!! You don't even load your own cartridges - they comes in little boxes and ya don't have to steady yourself against the rollbar of the roo shooting truck when you reload!
Sometimes ya gotta wrestle with the city boys and I gotta be real careful coz they break easy - it's not like fighting with Doug and Phil and Jack and Boori and Steve and Muzza all at once like we do at home after the muster.
Turns out I'm not a bad boxer either and it looks like I'm the best the platoon's got, and I've only been beaten by this one bloke from the Engineers - he's 6 foot 5 and 15 stone and three pickhandles across the shoulders and as ya know I'm only 5 foot 7 and eight stone wringin' wet, but I fought him till the other blokes carried me off to the boozer.
I can't complain about the Army - tell the boys to get in quick before word gets around how bloody good it is.
Your loving daughter,
Jill
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Reply #1 -
Oct 24
th
, 2005 at 9:32pm
Corsair Freak
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Colonel
Tiskilwa, Illinois, U.S.A.
Gender:
Posts: 1537
Now that's a woman.
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Reply #2 -
Oct 24
th
, 2005 at 10:19pm
flyboy 28
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Colonel
Jacksonville, FL
Posts: 13323
Andrew, I swear to the God you don't believe in I'll punch you in the jaw if you say it.
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Reply #3 -
Oct 24
th
, 2005 at 10:21pm
Corsair Freak
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Colonel
Tiskilwa, Illinois, U.S.A.
Gender:
Posts: 1537
O.O....
Fight! Fight! Fight!
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Reply #4 -
Oct 25
th
, 2005 at 1:01am
BFMF
Offline
Colonel
Pacific Northwest
Gender:
Posts: 19820
I know I've seen it here before
COMPLETED: If Anyone Cares, Here's A Map Of My Current FSX Flight Around The World
My Reality Check Bounced
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Reply #5 -
Oct 25
th
, 2005 at 4:47am
H
Offline
Colonel
2003: the year NH couldn't
save face...
NH, USA
Gender:
Posts: 6837
Quote:
Andrew, I swear to the God you don't believe in I'll punch you in the jaw if you say it.
Forget the jaw; punch him in the eyes. If they swell up enough he won't be able to see anything again so he'll have seen it before! ???... well, you know what I mean.
8)
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Reply #6 -
Oct 25
th
, 2005 at 9:58am
Souichiro
Ex Member
I didn;t expect that twist
Marvelous!!!
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Reply #7 -
Oct 25
th
, 2005 at 10:16am
Sytse
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Colonel
Virtual Red Arrows
The Netherlands
Gender:
Posts: 3590
&&
Virtual Red Arrows homepage
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Reply #8 -
Oct 25
th
, 2005 at 12:52pm
cableguy
Offline
Colonel
Denver, CO
Gender:
Posts: 365
Quote:
Forget the jaw; punch him in the eyes. If they swell up enough he won't be able to see anything again so he'll have seen it before! ???... well, you know what I mean.
8)
well lets chop the fingers off, so he cant type no more
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Reply #9 -
Oct 25
th
, 2005 at 3:22pm
Omag 2.0
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Colonel
No badger comes close!
Somewhere, Belgium
Gender:
Posts: 11985
Lol!
&&
&&&&Check my aviation-photo's at
www.airliners.be&&&&Or
go straight to
Omag's Album
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Reply #10 -
Oct 26
th
, 2005 at 12:44am
beefhole
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Colonel
common' yigs!
Philadelphia
Gender:
Posts: 4466
Haha great ending!
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Reply #11 -
Oct 26
th
, 2005 at 8:27am
ozzy72
Offline
Global Moderator
Pretty scary huh?
Madsville
Gender:
Posts: 37122
I haven't seen that one for years! Still makes me smile
There are two types of aeroplane, Spitfires and everything else that wishes it was a Spitfire!
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Reply #12 -
Oct 31
st
, 2005 at 4:31am
AlphaBravo
Offline
Colonel
Alpha and Badger ....hehehehe
Reading, Berkshire, UK
Gender:
Posts: 1050
BPB
... Well i think it has.....
&&
Add me to xfire: alphabravo0sw
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Reply #13 -
Oct 31
st
, 2005 at 10:54pm
Moach
Offline
Colonel
Jet-Powered PropellerHead
São Paulo, Brazil
Gender:
Posts: 991
Great one!!!!
liked the ending
Come, one and all aboard! - The Russian Roullete in the sky!
One in each Six of my personalities knows not at all how to fly!
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