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Elderly dating (Read 334 times)
Aug 25
th
, 2005 at 6:35pm
Romulus111VADT
Offline
Colonel
Gender:
Posts: 5521
A lonely woman, aged 80, decided that it was time to get married She put an ad in the local paper that read:
HUSBAND WANTED!
MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (80's),
MUST NOT BEAT ME,
MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME,
AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED!
ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON.
On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her
dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or
legs.
The old woman said, "You're not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you...you have no legs!"
The old man smiled, "Therefore I cannot run around on
you!"
She snorted. "You don't have any hands either!"
Again the old man smiled, "Nor can I beat you!"
She raised an eyebrow and gazed intently. "Are you
still good in bed?"
With that, the old gentleman leaned back, beamed a big broad smile and said:
"I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"
"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."
Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”
Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
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Reply #1 -
Aug 25
th
, 2005 at 7:19pm
zeberdee
Offline
Colonel
I love YaBB 1G - SP1!
Sunny Bradford Yorks uk
Gender:
Posts: 469
Very good
If your not part of the answer your part of the problem! &&I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. &&&&
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Reply #2 -
Aug 25
th
, 2005 at 7:25pm
Mynameisnemo
Ex Member
cool joke
.
*must try that someday* rofl
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Reply #3 -
Aug 25
th
, 2005 at 10:27pm
Jared
Offline
Colonel
I'd rather be flying...
Uniontown, Ohio
Gender:
Posts: 12621
LOL! Now that is disgustingly scary!
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Reply #4 -
Aug 26
th
, 2005 at 1:18am
Wing Nut
Offline
Colonel
Hoy-Hoy!
Gender:
Posts: 14173
Lame...
HP p7-1300w
AMD Athlon II X4 650 Quad-core 3.2 Ghz
23" HP Widescreen monitor/19" Dell monitor
Windows 7 Home Premium
16 Gb DDR3 PC10600 Ram
1 Gb GeForce GTX 550Ti video card
1 TB RAID Drives
If you want to see the most beautiful girl in the world, CLICK HERE!
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Reply #5 -
Aug 26
th
, 2005 at 4:05am
Romulus111VADT
Offline
Colonel
Gender:
Posts: 5521
Quote:
Lame...
LMAO, your just jealous cause he could still ring the door bell.....
"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."
Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”
Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
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Reply #6 -
Aug 26
th
, 2005 at 5:39am
Omag 2.0
Offline
Colonel
No badger comes close!
Somewhere, Belgium
Gender:
Posts: 11985
Lol!
Nice to hear of you BTW!
&&
&&&&Check my aviation-photo's at
www.airliners.be&&&&Or
go straight to
Omag's Album
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Reply #7 -
Aug 26
th
, 2005 at 7:19am
Fozzer
Offline
Colonel
An elderly FS 2004 addict!
Hereford. England. EGBS.
Posts: 24861
Fantastic....!
I've just re-wired my door bell for 240 volts....
....does amazing things for my Wiener*....
...!
Paul....must ring the bell again...and again...
...
...!
LOL...!
* Signature...
...!
P.S. Fozzer the thick-skinned...."Jokes Forum"...anything which makes me laugh is OK by me....
...
...
...!
Dell Dimension 5000 BTX Tower. Win7 Home Edition, 32 Bit. Intel Pentium 4, dual 2.8 GHz. 2.5GB RAM, nVidia GF 9500GT 1GB. SATA 500GB + 80GB. Philips 17" LCD Monitor. Micronet ADSL Modem only. Saitek Cyborg Evo Force. FS 2004 + FSX. Briggs and Stratton Petrol Lawn Mower...Motor Bikes. Gas Cooker... and lots of musical instruments!.... ...!
Yamaha MO6,MM6,DX7,DX11,DX21,DX100,MK100,EMT10,PSR400,PSS780,Roland GW-8L v2,TR505,Casio MT-205,Korg CX3v2 dual manual,+ Leslie 760,M-Audio Prokeys88,KeyRig,Cubase,Keyfax4,Guitars,Orchestral,Baroque,Renaissance,Medieval Instruments.
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Reply #8 -
Aug 26
th
, 2005 at 11:59am
Romulus111VADT
Offline
Colonel
Gender:
Posts: 5521
Quote:
Fantastic....!
I've just re-wired my door bell for 240 volts....
....does amazing things for my Wiener*....
...!
Paul....must ring the bell again...and again...
...
...!
LOL...!
* Signature...
...!
P.S. Fozzer the thick-skinned...."Jokes Forum"...anything which makes me laugh is OK by me....
...
...
...!
Wow, 240V...lmao....bet that provides quite a kick....
Also bet the neighbors will be watching and gossiping.
Be careful though, with all addictive habits, there can be side effects. I bet this one would provide you with a pair of twins that tend to light up like Christmas lights....
"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."
Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”
Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
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Reply #9 -
Aug 28
th
, 2005 at 6:10pm
the_autopilot
Offline
Colonel
Gender:
Posts: 1359
LMAO
Link to sig:&&
Click here
&&(Cannot post signature here due to current forum restrications on linked images).
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