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Priceless (Read 264 times)
Mar 31st, 2005 at 6:54pm

Romulus111VADT   Offline
Colonel

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Posts: 5521
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Robert wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Robert is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.

Robert had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! Robert sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean.

So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick!: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Nancy. He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper.

His son is also at the table, eating. Robert asks, "Son...what happened last night?" "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."

Confused he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?" His son replies,

"Oh THAT!... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, lady, I'm married!"

*Broken Coffee Table $39.99
*Hot Breakfast $4.20
*Two Aspirins $.38
*Saying the right thing, at the right time . . *Priceless!!!

Grin
 

"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."

Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."

Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”

Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
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Reply #1 - Mar 31st, 2005 at 9:44pm

Jared   Offline
Colonel
I'd rather be flying...
Uniontown, Ohio

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Posts: 12621
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Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin
 
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Reply #2 - Mar 31st, 2005 at 11:04pm

Anti-Societys Snake   Offline
Colonel
My Warlock could kick
your ass WITHOUT my help.
ohio

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F***king CLASSIC!!!!!!!!


~Snake
 
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Reply #3 - Apr 1st, 2005 at 5:12am

Craig.   Offline
Colonel
Birmingham

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Grin Grin LOL very good Grin
 
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Reply #4 - Apr 1st, 2005 at 7:53am

Tequila Sunrise   Offline
Colonel
Nunquam non paratus
Glasgow Scotland

Gender: male
Posts: 4149
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Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin
 

If someone with multiple personality disorder threatens suicide, is it a hostage situation?

Thou shalt maintain thine airspeed lest the ground shalt rise up and smite thee
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Reply #5 - Apr 1st, 2005 at 8:29am

spirit1flyer   Offline
Colonel
you are go for T.L.I.
  Copy that....

Posts: 175
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Grin
 

Red alert!!&& Red alert!!&&
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Reply #6 - Apr 1st, 2005 at 1:03pm

flyboy 28   Offline
Colonel
Jacksonville, FL

Posts: 13323
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See? Chivalry ain't dead.. yet.. Roll Eyes
 
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