A woman called the Cannon help desk with a problem with her printer.
The tech asker her if she was "running it under Windows."  The woman
then responded, "NO, my desk is next to the door.  But that's a good
point... The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window,
and his is working just fine."


Overheard in a computer shop:
Customer:    "I'd like a mouse pad, please."
Salesperson: "Certainly sir, we've got a large variety."
Customer:    "But will they be compatible with my computer?"


I once received a fax with a note on the bottom to fax the document
back to the sender when I was finished with it, because he needed to
keep it.


Customer: "Can you copy the internet for me onto this diskette?"


I work for a local ISP.  Frequently we receive phone calls that go
something like this:
Customer:  "Hi... Is this the internet?"


Some people pay for their online services with check made payable to
"The Internet."


Customer:     "So, that will get me connected to the Internet, right?"
Tech Support: "Yeah."
Customer:     "And that's the latest version of the Internet, right?"
Tech Support: "Uhh... uh... uh...yeah."


Customer:     "My computer crashed!"
Tech Support: "It crashed?"
Customer:     "Yeah, it won't let me play my game..."
Tech Support: "All right then, hit Control-Alt-Delete to reboot it."
Customer:     "No, it didn't crash - it crashed!"
Tech Support: "Huh?"
Customer:     "I crashed my game. That's what I said before! I crashed
             the spaceship, and now it doesn't work."
Tech Support: Click on "File", then "New Game".
Customer:     [pause] "Wow! How'd you learn how to do that?"

Great, funny, and older than dirt...   but that's OK!

Liked the last one

First time I heard those!  Funny!

Why do I get the feeling 'The Autopilot' is actually Hagar in disguise? 

Sorry your honor, the question is withdrawn...