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on the sixth day... (Read 1923 times)
Jun 15th, 2003 at 4:57am

liran_bar   Offline
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Ramon, we shall never
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Israel

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I don't mean to make any pilitical statments I just like this joke:

On The Sixth
And on the sixth day god turned to his angles and said: "Today I am going to create a state named Israel, a country with snowed mountains, shiny lakes, huge forests and cliffs watching over the shiny shores. It's people will be the Israelis, and they will be known all around the world".
"Don't you think you are being too generous with this people"- asked the angles.
"Not at all", said god, "Wait and see what kind of neighbours I am going to give them"

Liran Bar, Israel
 
...&&
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Reply #1 - Jun 15th, 2003 at 9:52am

ozzy72   Offline
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Liran, you are walking a v.fine line my friend.... Don't blame me if someone comes around and covers your house in marmelade...

Ozzy 8)
 
...
There are two types of aeroplane, Spitfires and everything else that wishes it was a Spitfire!
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Reply #2 - Jun 15th, 2003 at 12:02pm

liran_bar   Offline
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LOL I hope it won't happen
 
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Reply #3 - Jun 15th, 2003 at 1:41pm

Craig.   Offline
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well i am out of marmelade. but i have pleanty of BBQ sauce Grin
 
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Reply #4 - Jun 15th, 2003 at 1:47pm
visitor   Ex Member

 
Liran;

I know how you feel, here in Arkansas we
have to deal with Texas Roll Eyes AND Oklahoma Tongue
and as a nation, Canada Shocked

Just kidding, really Grin

If we could all find common ground to
to laugh on, things would be better!! Wink

My pastor liked it!

X
 
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Reply #5 - Jun 15th, 2003 at 2:55pm

liran_bar   Offline
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Ramon, we shall never
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Israel

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Well I didn't mean to make a plitical statement... but since you took it like that: "LOL Grin Grin"



Liran Bar, Israel
 
...&&
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Reply #6 - Jun 15th, 2003 at 4:49pm

Iroquois   Offline
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Happy Halloween
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Quote:
I know how you feel, here in Arkansas we
have to deal with Texas Roll Eyes AND Oklahoma Tongue
and as a nation, Canada Shocked


I resent that.

Anyway, we should steer clear of Middle-East peace issues even if they are just jokes. Every country has had problems like that (Even Canada) but we should still keep in mind that this is a very sensitive issue for some.
 
I only pretend to know what I'm talking about. Heck, that's what lawyers, car mechanics, and IT professionals do everyday. Wink&&The Rig: &&AMD Athlon XP2000+ Palomino, ECS K7S5A 3.1, 1GB PC2700 DDR, Geforce FX5200 128mb, SB Live Platinum, 16xDVD, 16x10x40x CDRW, 40/60gb 7200rpm HDD, 325w Power, Windows XP Home SP1, Directx 9.0c with 66.81 Beta gfx drivers
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Reply #7 - Jun 15th, 2003 at 6:11pm

SilverFox441   Offline
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Funny...up in Canada we tell the same joke. Just substitute Canada and Canadians for Isreal And Isrealis. Smiley
 
Steve (Silver Fox) Daly
&&
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Reply #8 - Jun 15th, 2003 at 8:10pm
visitor   Ex Member

 
orenda

Quote:
on Today at 12:47pm, visitor wrote:I know how you feel, here in Arkansas we
have to deal with Texas  AND Oklahoma  
and as a nation, Canada



Please Quote All My Statement.

Quote:
Just kidding, really


If I truly touched a nerve, I am sorry,
It was all in fun, I deeply agree with you as to

Quote:
but we should still keep in mind that this is a very sensitive issue for some.


X
 
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Reply #9 - Jun 15th, 2003 at 8:25pm

Iroquois   Offline
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Quote:
orenda


Please Quote All My Statement.


If I truly touched a nerve, I am sorry,
It was all in fun, I deeply agree with you as to


X


Aw, but I'm too lazy too,  Grin
 
I only pretend to know what I'm talking about. Heck, that's what lawyers, car mechanics, and IT professionals do everyday. Wink&&The Rig: &&AMD Athlon XP2000+ Palomino, ECS K7S5A 3.1, 1GB PC2700 DDR, Geforce FX5200 128mb, SB Live Platinum, 16xDVD, 16x10x40x CDRW, 40/60gb 7200rpm HDD, 325w Power, Windows XP Home SP1, Directx 9.0c with 66.81 Beta gfx drivers
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Reply #10 - Jun 16th, 2003 at 2:09am

stormy   Offline
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Quote:
Liran;

I know how you feel, here in Arkansas we
have to deal with Texas Roll Eyes AND Oklahoma Tongue
and as a nation, Canada Shocked

Just kidding, really Grin

If we could all find common ground to
to laugh on, things would be better!! Wink

My pastor liked it!

X

Hey Hey Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy "Easy now.. I happen to be from canada and I'm a good neighbour Cry Cry Cry Cry Grin Grin Wink
 
...
&&
Women Rule!!!!!!need I say more!!!!!!!
&&
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Reply #11 - Jun 16th, 2003 at 2:34am

BFMF   Offline
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Quote:
Easy now.. I happen to be from canada and I'm a good neighbour Cry Cry Cry Cry Grin Grin Wink [/glow]


That is unless you're upset at one of us Grin Grin

Oops, maybe I shouldn't have said that... Lips Sealed

lol
 
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Reply #12 - Jun 16th, 2003 at 2:35am

stormy   Offline
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Quote:
That is unless you're upset at one of us Grin Grin

Oops, maybe I shouldn't have said that... Lips Sealed

lol

Ya andrew look ouy here comes dooms day your way........lol
 
...
&&
Women Rule!!!!!!need I say more!!!!!!!
&&
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Reply #13 - Jun 18th, 2003 at 7:49pm

DeepSpace   Offline
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hey, that was nice liran  Wink
 
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Reply #14 - Jun 18th, 2003 at 8:00pm

Iroquois   Offline
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Happy Halloween
Ontario Canada

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Quote:
That is unless you're upset at one of us Grin Grin

Oops, maybe I shouldn't have said that... Lips Sealed

lol


Yea, we do have nuclear weapons pointed at all your major cities. Oops, I've said to much. (Orenda swallows cyanide tablet) Damn, this isn't cyanide It's <THUD>......................................

(PS: This reminds me of the movie Canadain Bacon, one of John Candy's finest comedies.)
 
I only pretend to know what I'm talking about. Heck, that's what lawyers, car mechanics, and IT professionals do everyday. Wink&&The Rig: &&AMD Athlon XP2000+ Palomino, ECS K7S5A 3.1, 1GB PC2700 DDR, Geforce FX5200 128mb, SB Live Platinum, 16xDVD, 16x10x40x CDRW, 40/60gb 7200rpm HDD, 325w Power, Windows XP Home SP1, Directx 9.0c with 66.81 Beta gfx drivers
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Reply #15 - Jun 19th, 2003 at 11:28am

BFMF   Offline
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lighten up Orenda, America & Canada have been friends/allies for a long time Smiley
 
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Reply #16 - Jun 22nd, 2003 at 9:46am

tomahawk   Offline
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Australia

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Quote:
Liran;

I know how you feel, here in Arkansas we
have to deal with Texas Roll Eyes AND Oklahoma Tongue
and as a nation, Canada Shocked

X


That's nothing in Australia, we have to deal with the rest of the world. Grin
 
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Reply #17 - Jun 22nd, 2003 at 10:18am

Lurch   Offline
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Quote:
That's nothing in Australia, we have to deal with the rest of the world. Grin

Actually you have to pity the rest of the world Tomahawk-we have to deal with you. Grin (just playing)
 
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Reply #18 - Jun 22nd, 2003 at 1:20pm

stormy   Offline
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Quote:
Actually you have to pity the rest of the world Tomahawk-we have to deal with you. Grin (just playing)

He gotcha Tomahawk .....lol Roll Eyes Tongue Grin
 
...
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Women Rule!!!!!!need I say more!!!!!!!
&&
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Reply #19 - Jun 23rd, 2003 at 12:24pm
Oso   Ex Member

 
Quote:
Liran;

I know how you feel, here in Arkansas we
have to deal with Texas  AND Oklahoma 
and as a nation, Canada 

X


Hmmm? I was always told the only thing that keeps Texas and the Gulf States from sliding off into the Gulf of Mexico was the fact that Oklahoma and Arkansas sucks.  Grin

BTW - there is some disinformation going around - has been for years.

Arkansas is not pronounced like (R Kan Saw) It is actually (R Kansas) Just like it is spelled.  Wink
 
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Reply #20 - Jun 23rd, 2003 at 7:21pm
visitor;AKA:X   Ex Member

 
Oso;

If it was that simple, TEXAS, pronounced,TAX ASS
would be floating far to the south, like:
Australia!!!! 8)

x


 
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Reply #21 - Jun 24th, 2003 at 1:15am

tomahawk   Offline
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Australia

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Quote:
Actually you have to pity the rest of the world Tomahawk-we have to deal with you. Grin (just playing)


Quote:
He gotcha Tomahawk .....lol Roll Eyes Tongue Grin


He did didn't he, but now he will have to be looking over his shoulder for some retaliation,

Me thinks. (Tomahawk Grin)

I'm only joking Grin Grin
 
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Reply #22 - Jul 8th, 2003 at 6:22pm

Whitey   Offline
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Ah, one of my most favourite jokes of all time.

When I heard it, though, it was Scotland! Grin Wink Smiley

All the English here will now proceed to slap me. Roll Eyes Tongue
 
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Reply #23 - Jul 8th, 2003 at 6:39pm

Woodlouse2002   Offline
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I think the description fits scotland more than isreal actually. Tongue
 
Woodlouse2002 PITA and BAR!!!!!!!!&&&&Our Sovereign Lord the King chargeth and commandeth all persons, being assembled, immediately to disperse themselves, and peaceably to depart to their habitations, or to their lawful business, upon the pains contained in the Act made in the first year of King George the First for preventing tumults and riotous assemblies. God Save the King.&&&&Viva la revolution!
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Reply #24 - Jul 9th, 2003 at 1:08am

liran_bar   Offline
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Ramon, we shall never
forget you!
Israel

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Quote:
I think the description fits scotland more than isreal actually. Tongue

it fits most of the western countries.....
Israel has snowy mountains, sunny beaches, shiny lakes and stuff....
Israel is a much more beatiful country than you see on television.... they only show you the conflicted areas..... people usually think that camels and sand is a common site in Israel. Grin....
actually Tel-Aviv is very similar to New-York, traffic jams, few parking spaces and lots of air polution Grin Cheesy


Liran Bar, Israel


speaking of scotland.... I know there is some sort of conflict between britons and scots... what's it all about?
 
...&&
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Reply #25 - Jul 9th, 2003 at 2:01am
visitor;AKA:X   Ex Member

 
Liran;

Kimber has been to Israel several times
and she loves the place, I'll have her
tell you where  she was when she gets
home.
Your description sounds a lot like Arkansas
but we only have snowy mountions in winter
time! Roll Eyes
Lots of lakes, lots of trees.

X
 
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Reply #26 - Jul 9th, 2003 at 7:59am

Woodlouse2002   Offline
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I like jam.
Cornwall, England

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Quote:
it fits most of the western countries.....
Israel has snowy mountains, sunny beaches, shiny lakes and stuff....
Israel is a much more beatiful country than you see on television.... they only show you the conflicted areas..... people usually think that camels and sand is a common site in Israel. Grin....
actually Tel-Aviv is very similar to New-York, traffic jams, few parking spaces and lots of air polution Grin Cheesy


Well, I don't pretend to be an expert on Isreal. But I know its in the sandy part of the world.

Quote:
speaking of scotland.... I know there is some sort of conflict between britons and scots... what's it all about?

Well several hundred years ago the scots rebelled and tried to gain their freedom. The english then proceeded to hammer them completely. The Robert Bruce came along and won for scotland... Thats all I know about it. All I can say is the scots are still a bit sore about it.
 
Woodlouse2002 PITA and BAR!!!!!!!!&&&&Our Sovereign Lord the King chargeth and commandeth all persons, being assembled, immediately to disperse themselves, and peaceably to depart to their habitations, or to their lawful business, upon the pains contained in the Act made in the first year of King George the First for preventing tumults and riotous assemblies. God Save the King.&&&&Viva la revolution!
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Reply #27 - Jul 9th, 2003 at 9:03am

liran_bar   Offline
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Ramon, we shall never
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Israel

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Hey woodlouse.... is Kimber you wife? I would love to here!


Israel is in the sandy part of the world yet we have forests and snowy mountains in the winter. what's so beatiful here that the snowiest mountain in Israel is only 8 hours of driving from the hottest city in Israel.



Liran Bar,Israel
 
...&&
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Reply #28 - Jul 9th, 2003 at 12:16pm

IAFpilot03   Offline
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if (stick pushed down)
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ISRAEL

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well, Israel sits on the desert "ring", stretching around the world, it includes the Sahara, and other famous deserts. However, after almost 200 years of work, we got it to blossom in certain areas Grin. The Negev desert is beautiful, and is home to a very rare natural phenomenon called a "Machtesh" (it's a word in Hebrew, but became an international term, ask any geologist and he'll tell you all about it) and northern Israel has natural as well as "patched up" forests (after WWI, when the turks cut down the trees for their locomotives, we were left with very little natural forest).

Simply put, this area of the world is beautiful, we just gotta take our eyes of the gun-sight and enjoy the view (that goes for both sides Roll Eyes)

IAFhippie
 
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Reply #29 - Jul 9th, 2003 at 12:27pm

liran_bar   Offline
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Ramon, we shall never
forget you!
Israel

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GOd IAF how do you know all that?
I always wondered how come we have so many forests and rivers.....


Liran Bar, Israel
 
...&&
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Reply #30 - Jul 9th, 2003 at 2:23pm
visitor;AKA:X   Ex Member

 
Woodlouse;

Quote:
Hey woodlouse.... is Kimber you wife? I would love to here!


Woody do we need to talk? Kimber told me she
traveled on business ??? Grin

Liran may have just read two posts at the same
time?? Roll Eyes

Liran;

I think we are all concerned about each other and
take time to learn about our friends here at Simviation!!

X Grin

 
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Reply #31 - Jul 9th, 2003 at 2:38pm

Woodlouse2002   Offline
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I like jam.
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I don't think Kimber is my wife... Not inless I missed something... Did I miss something? ???  Tongue Wink
 
Woodlouse2002 PITA and BAR!!!!!!!!&&&&Our Sovereign Lord the King chargeth and commandeth all persons, being assembled, immediately to disperse themselves, and peaceably to depart to their habitations, or to their lawful business, upon the pains contained in the Act made in the first year of King George the First for preventing tumults and riotous assemblies. God Save the King.&&&&Viva la revolution!
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Reply #32 - Jul 9th, 2003 at 3:02pm

IAFpilot03   Offline
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if (stick pushed down)
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ISRAEL

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well Liran,

you just pick it up when your uncle is a geologist/archeologist, your father is a tour guide, and your great grandfather is responsible for designing and building dozens of gardens and fountains across the country (does the name Gan Ha'Nadiv ring a bell?) Roll Eyes

IAFknow-it-all  8)
 
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Reply #33 - Jul 10th, 2003 at 5:38am

Whitey   Offline
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Let's get this staight.  Scotland is part of Britain.  For international reasons, I'm British.  But when people see British see British, they think you're English.  Everytime, I guarantee it.  I'm going to start hitting every person that calls me English when I'm on holiday abroad. Angry  I'm Scottish.

Now, the details.  Te English were cocky prats.  They were at war with France, we were seen as a nuisance and they wanted our land.  So, let's invade them.  We rebelled.  At the Battle of Stirling Bridge, we destroyed there army.  Drowned all there knights and stuff...the nobles leading the army fled back to England.  Now, old Longshanks wasn' happy about this, not one bit.  While he was formulating a new plane, William Wallce was in charge of the Scottish.  He and Robert Brice took back Stirling Castle and then William Wallace was caught.  The English had him hung, drawn and quartered...not a very nice thing to have done.  Anyway, Robert Bruce led us to victory in the battle of Banockburn and the the new king of England, Edward II, left us alone. Grin

The Romans were defeated when they tried to invade us too.  They built Hadriens Wall to stop us invading England and killing them all! Tongue
 
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Reply #34 - Jul 10th, 2003 at 7:16am

Woodlouse2002   Offline
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I like jam.
Cornwall, England

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Then in August 1999 Robert Bruce came down to cornwall and stayed in my house for the Eclipse. Grin
 
Woodlouse2002 PITA and BAR!!!!!!!!&&&&Our Sovereign Lord the King chargeth and commandeth all persons, being assembled, immediately to disperse themselves, and peaceably to depart to their habitations, or to their lawful business, upon the pains contained in the Act made in the first year of King George the First for preventing tumults and riotous assemblies. God Save the King.&&&&Viva la revolution!
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Reply #35 - Jul 13th, 2003 at 5:31am

EirePlane   Offline
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Quote:
Let's get this staight.  Scotland is part of Britain.  For international reasons, I'm British.  But when people see British see British, they think you're English.  Everytime, I guarantee it.  I'm going to start hitting every person that calls me English when I'm on holiday abroad. Angry  I'm Scottish.

Now, the details.  Te English were cocky prats.  They were at war with France, we were seen as a nuisance and they wanted our land.  So, let's invade them.  We rebelled.  At the Battle of Stirling Bridge, we destroyed there army.  Drowned all there knights and stuff...the nobles leading the army fled back to England.  Now, old Longshanks wasn' happy about this, not one bit.  While he was formulating a new plane, William Wallce was in charge of the Scottish.  He and Robert Brice took back Stirling Castle and then William Wallace was caught.  The English had him hung, drawn and quartered...not a very nice thing to have done.  Anyway, Robert Bruce led us to victory in the battle of Banockburn and the the new king of England, Edward II, left us alone. Grin

The Romans were defeated when they tried to invade us too.  They built Hadriens Wall to stop us invading England and killing them all! Tongue

And there was me thinking it was ove Henry VIII forcing people to change heir religion.
Thank God I have irish blood
 
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Reply #36 - Jul 13th, 2003 at 5:53am

Whitey   Offline
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Quote:
Then in August 1999 Robert Bruce came down to cornwall and stayed in my house for the Eclipse. Grin


Yeeees, whatever you say, Woody..... Roll Eyes

At least my story was true! Tongue Grin
 
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