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The phone call (Read 609 times)

Dec 21^st, 2012 at 8:30am

ozzy72 Offline
Global Moderator
Pretty scary huh?
Madsville

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Posts: 37122

An old man in Miami calls up his son in New York and says, "Listen, your mother and I are getting divorced. Forty-five years of misery is enough."

"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams.

“We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,” he says. "I'm sick of her face, and I'm sick of talking about this, so call your sister in Chicago and tell her," and he hangs up.
...

Now, the son is worried. So he calls up his sister. She says, "Like hell they’re getting divorced!" and calls her father immediately. "You’re not getting divorced! Don't do another thing, the two of us are flying home tomorrow to talk about this. Until then, don't call a lawyer, don't file a paper, DO YOU HEAR ME?” and she hangs up.

The old man turns to his wife and says "Okay, they’re coming for Christmas and paying their own airfares."

There are two types of aeroplane, Spitfires and everything else that wishes it was a Spitfire!

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Reply #1 - Dec 21^st, 2012 at 9:28am

CHUCK79 Offline
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"Good grief"
KOMK

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Posts: 4998

"Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth and danced the skies on laughter silvered wings. Sunward I've climbed and joined the tumbling mirth of sun split clouds.....and done a hundred things you have never dreamed of.....wheeled and soared and swung high in the sunlit silence. Hovering there, I've chased the shouting wind along and flung my eager craft through footless halls of air.

Up, up the long, delerious, burning blue I've topped the wind swept heights with easy grace where never Lark, nor even Eagle flew. While with silent lifting of mind I've trod the high untrespassed sanctity of space, put out my hand and touched the face of god"

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Reply #2 - Dec 21^st, 2012 at 9:42am

Romulus111VADT Offline
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Posts: 5521

That wouldn't work for me. Roll Eyes

I would have sent money to my mom to help pay for the divorce. Wink

My biological father wrote the book on assholiness.... Angry

"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."

Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."

Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”

Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”

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Reply #3 - Dec 22^nd, 2012 at 2:44am

H Offline
Colonel
2003: the year NH couldn't
save face...
NH, USA

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Posts: 6837

Romulus111VADT wrote on Dec 21^st, 2012 at 9:42am:

My biological father wrote the book on assholiness...

He wrote a disparaging book about the Pope?

« Last Edit: Dec 22^nd, 2012 at 5:36am by H »

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Reply #4 - Dec 22^nd, 2012 at 6:10am

Fozzer Offline
Colonel
An elderly FS 2004 addict!
Hereford. England. EGBS.

Posts: 24861

H wrote on Dec 22^nd, 2012 at 2:44am:

Romulus111VADT wrote on Dec 21^st, 2012 at 9:42am:

My biological father wrote the book on assholiness...

He wrote a disparaging book about the Pope?

...

...!

That's what I call; "Quick off the Mark!"... Smiley

...!

Paul... Grin

...

...!

...Luke, and John?

Dell Dimension 5000 BTX Tower. Win7 Home Edition, 32 Bit. Intel Pentium 4, dual 2.8 GHz. 2.5GB RAM, nVidia GF 9500GT 1GB. SATA 500GB + 80GB. Philips 17" LCD Monitor. Micronet ADSL Modem only. Saitek Cyborg Evo Force. FS 2004 + FSX. Briggs and Stratton Petrol Lawn Mower...Motor Bikes. Gas Cooker... and lots of musical instruments!.... ...!
Yamaha MO6,MM6,DX7,DX11,DX21,DX100,MK100,EMT10,PSR400,PSS780,Roland GW-8L v2,TR505,Casio MT-205,Korg CX3v2 dual manual,+ Leslie 760,M-Audio Prokeys88,KeyRig,Cubase,Keyfax4,Guitars,Orchestral,Baroque,Renaissance,Medieval Instruments.

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Reply #5 - Dec 22^nd, 2012 at 12:01pm