I had one of those priceless moments yesterday in the park with my children. As many of you know, my wife is Germany so my children had grown up speaking both languages. They were both fluent by the age of five. The oldest has started to read English, he has just turned eight and is quite proud that he can read two languages. So, back to yesterday, walking around the park we were talking about English after someone had noted that they could chop and change between English and German like it was the most natural thing in the world. At this point, my oldest turns to me and says, "it's fun being able to read English too, look it says f#ck off on that wall". Well he was right, it did, in large spray painted letters. Not a lot I could say really except explain that it was a word that should not be used by a small boy........Thanks local teenagers

Matt

ozzy72 wrote on Mar 21^st, 2011 at 8:14am:



Know how you feel, my youngest who is six corrected my pronunciation of a German word a few days ago. Not the end of the world, but it was in public much to the amusment of those around me. By the time we got home, it was too late to beat him to a pulp 

Matt

That reminds me of an embarrassing faux pas I made shortly after I started working in Germany.

I was invited to go shooting at the local gun club range which was in an old stne quarry deep in a woods. At the time my vocabulary was very limited and I didn't know the words I needed, so I improvised with the few words I did know.

When I was asked where I was going, I meant to say I am going shooting in the woods (not knowing the words for quarry, club etc), but what actually came out was I am going for a sh*t in the woods 

whitley wrote on Mar 21^st, 2011 at 10:56am:



I can beat that......The word for a dogs paw in German is "Pfoten" and is very close to the German "C" word. Well, whist describing my dog who is a Shepherd/Lab cross, I said he was more Lab than Shepherd on account of him having swim skin between his "German-C-word". It was at at party and the whole room went from 100 to zero in half a heart beat. At this point a voice remarked,"four of them, lucky dog" and the room collapsed. I caught up about a minute later when a friend with tears in his eyes told me what I had said. Took a long while to live that one down.


Matt

My girlfriend was raised bilingual, Dutch is her third language. When her familiy gets a visit from people of her home country, they first agree on which language to talk in before starting a discussion

expat wrote on Mar 21^st, 2011 at 7:29pm:


Hmm, wonder why I had a flashback of Buddy Love (Eddie Murphy) and his hot tube scene with grandma? 

The part with the dentures about did me in.....

But if they take their teeth out in advance it chaffs a LOT less I'm reliably informed

Matt, the only difference between myself and a kidney dialysis machine is shape. We both do the same job

ozzy72 wrote on Mar 22^nd, 2011 at 4:11pm:



Nice one centurion 

Matt

U4EA wrote on Mar 24^th, 2011 at 2:41am:




Matt

patchz wrote on Mar 24^th, 2011 at 5:46am:



An (ex)serviceman never strays far from the humour he spent a large portion of his life refining 

Matt

patchz wrote on Mar 25^th, 2011 at 4:27am:



The Uniform code of humour, saying what other people are thinking

Matt

You don't have to be in uniform to do that. Us grey-haired old sods have been saying what we think for years.*

However, I try to use a little diplomacy on this forum.

*PS. Young people (teenagers) tend to do it too.

ozzy72 wrote on Mar 25^th, 2011 at 1:09pm:

Bad choice of words on my part. Perhaps tact would have been better. My point was that you don't need to be an ex-serviceman or ex-cop to say what you think.

expat wrote on Mar 24^th, 2011 at 5:21am:


The HandyWipes may have some other uses for some...............HOWEVER! I have a severe MtnDew habit and have a tendency to sip/swill/gulp some when pages are opening up.  If a LOL/LMAO/ROTFLMAO moment occurs at the wrong time(s), it sometimes leads to said Dew being 're-atmosphered', not necessarily followin' it's path-of-origin.

Hence my lovely ensuring that I do not hafta break my neck trying to get a towel or something from somewhere down the hall.

I sorta figgered that reply would get some sorta preverted convolution.   Fargin' bastages!

I think the truth is that engineers are always brutally honest because they have to be, it doesn't matter which discipline. A wing being an inch out for fitting or a computer build being done wrong results in the same consequences! E.g. it don't ruddy work!
I think this is why I love being an engineer, PC doesn't cut the mustard in the real world

Steve M wrote on Mar 27^th, 2011 at 10:38am:

For some reason, that reminded me of Mel Gibson's line in Air America.

Rob Diehl: You know more about it than American intelligence Gene!
Gene Ryack: Rob, I wish you wouldn't use the words American Intelligence to describe what it is you do!