Simviation Forum - Stranger In My Mirror

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Stranger In My Mirror (Read 183 times)

Jul 5^th, 2010 at 7:17am

Romulus111VADT Offline
Colonel

Gender:
Posts: 5521

Please be careful.

This person has found his way into my house and could

also get into yours.

A very weird thing has happened.

A strange old man has moved into my

house. I have no idea who he is, where he came from,

or how he got in. I certainly did not invite him.

All I know is that one day he wasn't there, and the next day he was.

He is a clever old fart and manages to keep out of sight

for the most part, but whenever I pass a mirror I catch a

glimpse of him. And, whenever I look in the mirror to check my

appearance, there he is hogging the whole thing, completely,

obliterating my face and body. This is very rude!

I have tried screaming at him, but he just screams back.

The least he could do is offer to pay part of the rent, but no.

Every once in a while, I find a dollar bill stuck in a coat pocket,

or some loose change under a sofa cushion, but it is not nearly enough.

I don't want to jump to conclusions, but I think he is stealing money

from me. I go to the ATM and withdraw $100, and a few days later,

it's all gone!

I certainly don't spend money THAT fast, so I can only conclude
the old fart is stealing from me.

And money isn't the only thing I think he is stealing. Food seems to

disappear at an alarming rate-especially the good stuff like ice cream,

cookies and candy. He must have a real sweet tooth, but he'd better

watch it, because he is really packing on the pounds.

I suspect he realizes this, and to make himself feel better, he is

tampering with my scale to make me think I am putting on weight too.

For an old man, he is quite childish. He likes to play nasty games,

like going into my closets when I'm not home and

altering my clothes so they don't fit.

And he messes with files and papers so I can't find anything.

This is particularly annoying since I am extremely neat and organized.

He has found other imaginative ways to annoy me.

He gets into my mail, newspapers and magazines before

I do and blurs the print so I can't read it.

And he has done something really sinister to the volume controls on my

TV, radio and telephone. Now, all I hear are mumbles and whispers.

He has done other things - like make my stairs steeper

and all the knobs and faucets harder to turn. He even made my

bed higher so that getting into and out of it is a real challenge.

Lately, he has been fooling with my groceries before I put them away,

applying glue to the lids, making it almost impossible for me to open the jars.

He has taken the fun out of shopping for clothes. When I try something

on, he stands in front of the dressing room mirror and monopolizes it.

He looks totally ridiculous in some of those outfits, plus he keeps me

from seeing how great they look on me.

Just when I thought he couldn't get any meaner, he proved me wrong.

He came along when I went to get my picture taken for my driver's

license and just as the camera shutter clicked, he jumped in front of

me.

I hope he never finds out where you live.

I really do!

Wink

"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."

Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."

Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”

Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”