argggg here be spoilers
I just went to see what is hopefully the
final installment of "pirates of the caribbean" earlier today.
Three hours of my life that i will never have back.
I loved the first movie
i felt like the second movie was way out in left field
but the third flick... departed left field, over the wall, down the stairs to the 3C exit, went out to the parking lot and got in its car, took the Eisenhower expressway to Interstate 55, drove to new orleans and boarded a tramp steamer which then proceeded to sail the movie to the south pole - about as far out as you can get!
what a stinker of a film.
This film is built with all the entertainment value and thought provoking content that a six year old looks for, but also all the guts, gore and sexual suggestion that a 17 year old looks for. with that said im not really sure who the target audience was - but i DO know it wasnt me.
The movie begins with all of the pirates being rounded up and hung, in order to prevent this from happening the 8 pirate kings (the mexican pirate king - the asian pirate king - the middle eastern pirate king - the euro pirate king - and what appeared to be some sort of 70 year old geisha pirate and a hand full of others) must band together to free the goddess of the sea to help them defeat what appears to be the ENTIRE royal navy. In order to assemble this super pirate army - the pirate gang must travel to all the ends of the earth and back in a sailing ship in what amounts to about 3 or 4 days in the film. in the end - even though the entire royal navy of what seemed to be 500 ships and the entire pirate navy of perhaps 20 ships are in close quarters preparing for a battle to end all naval battles - only two ships actually engage one another - and after the royal navy loses it's flag ship they all retreat back to england.
the movie ends with will turner being killed but as he dies he takes command of the flying dutchman. This in turn gives him the task of escorting souls lost at sea into the afterlife... and for every ten years at sea he gets to come ashore to spend ONE DAY with his love interest Elizabeth Swann. The film closes with Jack Sparrow charting a course - in a dingy no less - to search for the fountain of youth -
i hope he finds it so that i may learn of its location and get at least the lost 3 hours of my youth back!
if you like special effects and thats the only reason you see a film - you are going to love this movie
if you were hoping for something a little less harry potter and a little more master and commander - find some other film to watch
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