ACURA - Always Catching Up, Rarely Ahead

AUDI - Accelerates Under Demonic Influence

BMW - Bavarian Money Waster

CHEVROLET - Can Hear Every Valve Rattle On Long Extended Trips

DODGE - Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere

FIAT - Fix It Again, Tony - or - Found in a Tip

FORD - Fixed Or Repaired Daily; (Backwards) Driver Returns On Foot  - or - Found On Roadside Dead

GMC - Got a Mechanic Coming?

HONDA - Honest, Officer, Nobody Drank Anything; Had One, Never Did Again

HYUNDAI - Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive

JEEP - Journey Eventually Ends Perpendicularly - or - Just Enough Essential Parts

KIA - Korea's Incompetence Amazing

MAZDA - Mismanages A Zillion Dollars Annually

LAND ROVER - Loud, Agonizing, Noisy Drive - Rattles On Virtually Every Road

PLYMOUTH - Please Leave Your Money Out Under The Hood

PORSCHE - Pity Only Rich Snobs Can Have +Em

ROVER - Rattles On Virtually Every Road

SAAB - Send Another Automobile Back; Swedish Autos Always Breakdown

SATURN - Stickers Are Truly Unnegotiable, Rebates Nonexistent

TOYOTA - Too Often Yankees Overprice This Automobile

VW - Virtually Worthless

VOLVO - Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

LoL!!!! 

Some dutch ones with translation

BSA - Bij storm afstappen (Dismount in storms). BSA made motorbikes
SKODA - Samen knutselen onder de auto (fix it together working on the underside)
DKW - Dat kreng weigert (the f*cker doesn't work). DKW was a car manuacturer from germany.