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World's toughest dog (Read 794 times)
Sep 26
th
, 2004 at 1:06pm
Romulus111VADT
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Colonel
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Posts: 5521
Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight. They would have 5 years to breed the best fighting dog in the world and whichever side's dog won would be declared the winner and no longer interfere with the world.
Osama found the biggest, meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and bred them with the meanest Siberian wolves. They selected only the biggest and strongest puppy from the litter, and removed his siblings,which gave him all the milk.
After 5 years, they came up with the biggest, meanest dog the world had ever seen.
Its cage needed steel bars that were 5 " thick and nobody could get near it. When the day came for the dog fight, Bush showed up with a strange looking animal.
It was a 18 foot long Dachshund.
Everyone felt sorry for Bush because there was no way that this dog could possibly last 10 seconds with the Osama's monster dog.
When the cages were opened up, the Dachshund came out of it's cage, and slowly waddled over towards Osama's dog.
Osama's dog snarled and leaped out of its cage and charged the American Dachshund--- but when it got close enough to bite, the Dachshund opened its mouth and consumed Osama's dog in one bite. There was nothing left of his dog at all.
Osama came up to Bush, shaking his head in disbelief,
"We don't understand how this could have happened. We had our best people working for 5 years with the meanest Doberman and Rottweiler female dogs in the world and the biggest, meanest Siberian wolves."
"That's nothing,", said Bush. "We had Michael Jackson's plastic surgeons working for 5 years to make that alligator look like a wiener dog."
"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."
Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”
Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
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Reply #1 -
Sep 26
th
, 2004 at 1:25pm
ozzy72
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Global Moderator
Pretty scary huh?
Madsville
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Posts: 37122
Nasty, yet strangely amusing
Romulus strikes again 8)
There are two types of aeroplane, Spitfires and everything else that wishes it was a Spitfire!
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Reply #2 -
Sep 26
th
, 2004 at 1:30pm
Craig.
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Birmingham
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Posts: 18590
LOL
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Reply #3 -
Sep 26
th
, 2004 at 1:53pm
Tequila Sunrise
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Nunquam non paratus
Glasgow Scotland
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lol
If someone with multiple personality disorder threatens suicide, is it a hostage situation?
Thou shalt maintain thine airspeed lest the ground shalt rise up and smite thee
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Reply #4 -
Sep 26
th
, 2004 at 2:56pm
alrot
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Colonel
Freeware Designers Above
All..
Posts: 10231
Just for me,the joke would be funnier if you wouldn't mentioned that piece of &$"% Osama,perhaps saddam i would swalowed
«
Last Edit: Sep 26
th
, 2004 at 8:14pm by alrot
»
Venezuela
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Reply #5 -
Sep 27
th
, 2004 at 4:40pm
Skittles
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Colonel
N769JC: "Isn't simulating
stimulating?
JAQ: Westover Field, CA (O70)
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Posts: 837
I don't like it. It tells me that Bush can't beat Osama unless he cheats.
But, Osama didn't say "no cheating" did he?
What do computers and air conditioners have in common?
They both will work perfectly, until you open windows.
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Reply #6 -
Sep 27
th
, 2004 at 5:25pm
Romulus111VADT
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Colonel
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Posts: 5521
Quote:
I don't like it. It tells me that Bush can't beat Osama unless he cheats.
But, Osama didn't say "no cheating" did he?
It's a joke for crying out loud, don't make it into a political statement, please.
"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."
Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”
Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
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Reply #7 -
Sep 27
th
, 2004 at 7:12pm
pete
Offline
Admin
'That would be a network
issue'
Cloud Cuckoo Land
Posts: 8500
LOL
Quote:
It's a joke for crying out loud, don't make it into a political statement, please.
Exactly
Think Global. It's the world we live in.
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Reply #8 -
Sep 27
th
, 2004 at 10:37pm
Jared
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I'd rather be flying...
Uniontown, Ohio
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Reply #9 -
Sep 28
th
, 2004 at 11:42am
Skittles
Offline
Colonel
N769JC: "Isn't simulating
stimulating?
JAQ: Westover Field, CA (O70)
Gender:
Posts: 837
Quote:
It's a joke for crying out loud, don't make it into a political statement, please.
Well, I
thought
I was trying to be funny, I should have worded it differently.
What do computers and air conditioners have in common?
They both will work perfectly, until you open windows.
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Reply #10 -
Sep 28
th
, 2004 at 11:56am
Romulus111VADT
Offline
Colonel
Gender:
Posts: 5521
Quote:
Well, I
thought
I was trying to be funny, I should have worded it differently.
No problem, I may have just misunderstood your intent.
"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."
Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”
Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
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Reply #11 -
Oct 1
st
, 2004 at 5:56pm
Squeek
Offline
Colonel
Legacy the poor mans Learjet
United States of America
Gender:
Posts: 820
im gettin a kick out of it
A poet, A virtual Pilot, and a member of Civil Air Patrol. Now if only.....&&&&Current ride, a 1972 Honda CT70 with a 3-speed transmition w/ and automatic clutch. So far i've gotten it to do 40mph.
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Reply #12 -
Oct 2
nd
, 2004 at 9:25am
Romulus111VADT
Offline
Colonel
Gender:
Posts: 5521
Quote:
im gettin a kick out of it
Sort of puts a new twist on the military and it's old saying, "Adapt and overcome", doesn't it.
"I have a place where dreams are born, And time is never planned. It’s not on any chart, You must find it with your heart."
Albert Einstein - "Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."
Martin Luther King Jr. - “Nothing in the world is more dangerous than a sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - “There is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity.”
Mark Twain - “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”
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Reply #13 -
Oct 3
rd
, 2004 at 3:25pm
SideWinder9
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Colonel
Denver,CO
Gender:
Posts: 1753
LOL!!! 8)
Sim-V member since 2003!
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Reply #14 -
Oct 10
th
, 2004 at 2:04am
the_autopilot
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Colonel
Gender:
Posts: 1359
How insulting.
Americans have to cheat to win...
And this is a political statement, if it isn't, why isn't other people used, for example miahail jackson himslef and someone else.
This is utterly degrading and morally bankrupt.
Link to sig:&&
Click here
&&(Cannot post signature here due to current forum restrications on linked images).
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