A lawyer, a rabbi and a priest are in a boat in shark-infested waters. The boat springs a leak, and they draw straws to pick who will have to leave the boat and try to swim to shore. The rabbi loses, and he jumps into the water and is promptly consumed by the sharks. The priest and the lawyer next draw straws, and the priest loses. He then jumps into the water, and the sharks quickly devour him. When the boat is almost filied with water, the lawyer jumps into the water and begins swimming to shore. When the lawyer gets to shore, the people on the beach run over to him and ask, "How is it that the priest and rabbi were eaten by the sharks, and you were given a clear path?" The lawyer responded, "Professional courtesy!"





Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a battery?

A: There's a positive side to the battery.