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Lawyer Jokes... (Read 347 times)

Sep 6^th, 2003 at 10:39am

Wing Nut Offline
Colonel
Hoy-Hoy!

Gender:
Posts: 14173

Q: Hear about the terrorist that hijacked a 747 full of lawyers?

A: He threatened to release one every hour if his demands weren't met.

A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?"
"I'm a chiropractor, and I'm just keeping in practice while I'm waiting in line."
"Well, I'm a lawyer, but you don't see me screwing the guy in front of me, do you?"

What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician?

Chelsea Clinton.

Q: What do you have when 100 lawyers are buried up to their neck in sand?

A: Not enough sand.

What do you get when you cross a lawyer and a pig?

Nothing. There are some things even a pig won't do!

What's the difference between a catfish and a lawyer?

One's a slimy scum-sucking bottom-dwelling scavenger, the other is just a fish.

What do you call a lawyer who doesn't know the law?

A judge.

HP p7-1300w
AMD Athlon II X4 650 Quad-core 3.2 Ghz
23" HP Widescreen monitor/19" Dell monitor
Windows 7 Home Premium
16 Gb DDR3 PC10600 Ram
1 Gb GeForce GTX 550Ti video card
1 TB RAID Drives

If you want to see the most beautiful girl in the world, CLICK HERE!

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Reply #1 - Sep 6^th, 2003 at 1:24pm

Tequila Sunrise Offline
Colonel
Nunquam non paratus
Glasgow Scotland

Gender:
Posts: 4149

LMAO

If someone with multiple personality disorder threatens suicide, is it a hostage situation?

Thou shalt maintain thine airspeed lest the ground shalt rise up and smite thee

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Reply #2 - Sep 6^th, 2003 at 7:58pm

Deputy Offline
Colonel
Hillsboro, Oregon

Gender:
Posts: 2090

Doesn't amuse me. . . Angry

Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when I come for you?&&&&Iustita Omnibus&&Justice for All&&&&Women are: attractive, single, mentally stable. Pick two.&& &&Yes, we drive on the right-hand-side of the road. Yes, I parked on the left-hand-side of the road. Yes, I blocked traffic for a picture. &&&&&&

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Reply #3 - Sep 7^th, 2003 at 3:05am