Hey guys, i have to thank alot of you here. Today things sort of hit me and i think alot of things are starting to really become clearer and easier to deal with. And to be quite honest with you, i doubt they would if you guys hadnt been around to help. I thought i would go into what hit me first.
Basically this afternoon, it hit me its time to really go forward with life, i dont know what it was but just everything that has been building up inside of me finally just came out today, you guys have in some cases have seen what i am like in a bad and upset mood, but generally they arnt even close to being bad and its slowly just built up over the last 16 months, and today it came out, i had one all mighty explosion, luckaly no one was home and apart from a few things being thrown and hit nothing was broken. After that everything just seemed to click for me, As it pertains to my Ex, as far as i am concerned i am now ready to just give up(hagar that pm i sent you should show how difficult a descion this was) i realised i have been appologising begging and trying everything i could to make up with her and it hasnt worked, why we initially broke up wasnt major in the first place and it was a small screw up on my part, if none of it meant anything to her then whatever i cant carry on like i am. second thing i realised i am going to have to enroll in college its going to cost me the £700 i spent to do it at home but i want to move to the states and i wont get there sitting here doing nothing. i have received in the past interest from a few community colleges about attending them, while also playing soccer for them, with a possible partial scholarship, only problem at the time were my injuries and i dont have them anymore, i am a pretty darn good soccer player so i might see if i can drum up interest again and enroll at the next possible semester or whenever possible. I have always lived my life before this girl comes along aiming for the top and have always been capable of doing whatever i wanted, and now its time to get back into that and grab that brass ring.
now none of this would be possible without the help of you guys. and thats where the thanks come into it.
Firstly 3 of you here who have been unbelieveable help to me. Ozzy Hagar and Mr Fozzer, you guys have earned my upmost respect for life and i owe you everything, thank you gentlemen:)
then i would also like to thank rifleman, Ken thankyou for spending time to look into the various silly questions i have asked you again you've earned my respect. and thank you for the advice you have also provided in my personal matters.
i would also like to thank the other Ken, hyperion, and fly2e you guys have provided me with some really interesting discussions which could have turned into some locked topics but we managed  not only keep them friendly but also extremely informative:) also you all seem to share some love of tri-jets:) that and you've also all provided some really cool pics to.
Andrew, Wendy, Craig's(how ever many we happen to have:)) Maccers and Will all of you thanks for making me feel welcome here and thank you all for the adivce you have all provided aswell. thanks to Flyboy for bringing up the 2500 posts thing, meant alot, and anytime you need some help just ask, i will do my best to help.
and i would like to also mention Tipster we talked on a few occasions and he helped me no end on a few problems and he has also earned my respect, you will be miss my friend.
Finally, Pete, thank you for running such a great site, generally you see some of these other forums and theres just no way i would have gotten the same help anywhere else, and i want to thank you for the time and effort you put into running this place and the times you have helped me with my technical questions again you have earned my respect.
This isnt really a good bye as i plan to be around a little while longer, but i realised this has been long overdue. and i know i have really pissed off some of you with my problems but please believe me i am really gratefull.
if i missed anyone out it wasnt intentional and please speak up and i will gladly thank you for your help you've all helped me in some way so it wont be hard to find a reason to:)
thanks again
Craig

Craig. I never expected to see this. I thought at one time that you were a hopeless case. Glad you got yourself sorted out at last.

I'm sure you're doing the right thing. Delighted if my constant nagging helped put you on the right track. Hope I wasn't too hard on you. Good luck for the future.

short of beating me down with a 2x4 you cant be to hard on me:) your advice has been really helpful both of you. i think it required that outburst as i really havent done that yet.

I've never seen you as anything but inquisitive and cool..... 8)..........

..........         .............Stay Cool..........

.......everyone has their own stuff to deal with, and you seem to me, to cope just fine.....I know things can be hard with some of the things that life throws our way, heck 11 yrs ago my life was hell....20 yr marriage breakup......that was my shit to deal with.....oops sorry, but thats one I'm not takin' back !.....you all know how bad it can be.....

.....always, always, always, look to tomorrow, ....you may still hear birds sing, see blue skies, fly a kite, .....whatever,...if there is something in life that you enjoy, then enjoy it and try to push that horrid "down" feeling back a bit........

..........smiles await everyone,....its up to you to grab and enjoy them.........

Again thankyou all:)
Its strange, but that was prob the hardest thing i really ever had to do. She was my dream girl and everything was perfect.  thats why i think it has been just so difficult to get over it.
But from now on, its time to move forward look forward and get on with it:). I am hoping to start by getting a decent nights sleep tonight, that will really help to clear my head and tomorow i will begin to search for colleges.
again thankyou, i am very gratefull for your kind words, and all the help you have given:)

Hey craigL are we long lost brothers or something? You are starting to sound like me! , Sounds to me like God has something even greater planned for your life.  Every time I start to question whether life is going to get better it just seems to get worse, but eventually I end up realizing that something even better will happen in the end. 

In god’s time,

Jared

P.S. I'm here to talk whenever too...

It always does.    You've just gotta find the patience to wait for that next bigger and better thing...whatever it may be.

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A little late in seeing this thread

Just glad we could be friends here.

Keep in touch!

-Andrew